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I feel like a Sad Clown

Sad Clown

Your makeup smears

As your traits appear

Your ptsd stays near

I’m my own personal threat

I forget things

Can’t remember me in a mirror

I remember snippets of myself

Locked in a room

In the dark

Stuck in a room

Goto sleep now

The dogs will get you

Don’t forget to pray!

If only you knew

Sit at this table, don’t look silly you!

I withdrew from it all

If only you FUCKING knew

Figure IT OUT

I remember a lot of things

And they hurt so bad

If only I could kill the killer

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A Small Update

If anyone can tell I haven’t been posting here that often at all. I’ve been quiet busy with other projects I’m working on. This was my goal for this website anyways was to set up a easy shop and page to find my art/music. Now it’s time to focus on my other projects.

I’ve recently gotten ads on both websites I run, aka this one, and Fangz. It’s going really well so far, I’ve met people, I’ve been practicing my writing since I write so much now. I’ve been writing so much and drafting and publishing stuff that I’m going over my own post now, It’s like second nature.

I need to write a new Runescape update, I’ve done a lot since the last one, ya boy has put a lot of time into it. However, to be honest, I kind of haven’t been playing Runescape as much though. Actually not much at all, I realized it was taking a little too much of my time. I’ve also been playing this game called Torn. It’s a text based multiplayer game. It’s like a real life RPG, you can be a good guy or a criminal, so far i’m a criminal/trader. Meaning I buy low and sell high when it comes to items. My whole life is based off timers now so I don’t die. I’m learning time management on a video game boys and girls. It’s actually a really old game. I’ve gotten a few friends to check it out and play but nobody stuck to it like me.

I recorded my first song in awhile, actually I have an album in the works at the moment. It’s not a big one and it’s pretty experimental but I’m very excited for it. I haven’t made a title for it but I have a very clear story line for it. I’m basically done trying to follow what people say about music and just do me.  We’ll see how it goes to be honest.

I’ve been pretty stacked with commissions as of recently, I have about five I need to work on, I have about four sketched out. I’m excited to finish them as they look really good to me. I’ll be sure to post them here when they are ready.

I also have taken over DatPizz, I currently co-run it with 5k at the moment. Things have been going really well. I’ve been selling a decent amount of art as well, a little backed up on commissions but they are looking amazing. I’m excited to see where Fangz takes me in a couple months. It’s been blowing up decently recently. The team of writers and I have been going hard in the paint.  Big thanks to them.

Well thanks for reading, much love. Be back soon. Also click my ads please I need to feed my family holy shit.

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Introducing The New Referral System, Earn $5 By Emotionull

Recently I decided it would be a good idea to get people to help me make sales by helping them earn a little money. It’s simple enough, the system is like any other system. You sign up via the Affiliate Page. From here you’ll register with the Emotionull Referral system, easy right? From here you’ll go on to the Creatives tab which will provide you with ways for you tell keep track of your sales. Here you can generate a link or use one of the provided creatives. 

I’m hoping this increases sales via my Art Shop a bit more. I’d love to make selling art a living at some point. That’s not going to happen anytime soon but it’s good to dream and work towards those goals. The rewards per referral is $5 per successful purchase. That may seem hard but it’s easy as sharing with your family and friends and over your social media accounts.

If you have any questions feel free to visit the Contact Page, Email me, ([email protected]) or you can contact me via Twitter.

Again to sign up for the referral system you’ll go to the following link.
https://emotionull.net/affiliate-home/

Once here you’ll sign up and head to the Creatives page.

https://emotionull.net/affiliate-home/?sub=creatives

Start sharing the link and get to earning!

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Starting A New Project, Fangz Media

It’s Emotionull, I’ve come to bring you amazing news. Please rejoice.

I’ve been working on a project with a few friends who I’ve met through the underground scene, So as you know the musical underground scene has a lot of blogs, but they never have blogs representing the art community. We decided that we would be the ones to cover said scene instead of letting it get no exposure like it has been. Cover arts matter, shirt designs matter. There’s much more work behind a musical release besides just the music. I don’t think people realize that. Plus theirs so many artists trying hard everyday just to get their name out there. I know cause I’m one of them.

So that’s my goal, Exposing the underground art scene.

So what’s the point of this? 
I’d just like you guys to go check it out if you have a chance. We’ll be release our first article very soon. I’ve already done two interviews with a few artists I enjoy and much more is planned soon. 

So what are you doing?

Go check it out….

Fangz.ink

Also check out the Team page to see who I’m working with. Much love to them.

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Back Online And Ready To Rumble

 

I’m Back And I Feel Like A Human

No one is really better. You just get past the feelings you had, overcome them, learn from them.. They are still there though, existing deep in your mind. You may not remember them but they are there. I’m not sure what is bothering me deep down. Is it something internally or is it health reasons? Is it something I’m stuck on without thinking or is it from what I eat and how I take care of myself? The older I get the weirder life gets, it’s really hard to explain. I wish I had words for it but right now I don’t. I’m working on myself though again. Sometimes I get overwhelmed and give up on taking care of myself.

Once again from now on my daily regime will consist of taking my herbs again, which consist of Oat Straw, Polygala root, Magnolia Bark, and Rhodiola. I also started taking Magnesium and L-theanine day and night.

I use to take these consistently but I stopped randomly. Something in me just clicked and gave up at some point. However, I’m starting again. I’m going to try to stay consistent. If I keep up the herbs and continue biking to work, as well as eating right. If one takes care of ones self and takes action you will feel better.

I took a break from social media for about a week, only visited a forum in my spare time. Forums are great, I’ve been using them a long time. They give me a good nostalgic feeling. I enjoy running them as well, I’ve been working on a forum with someone else but it’s been on a pretty big stand still. Not sure when it will be opened and released.

Besides that I’ve been playing Runescape and brain storming for more art pieces. I feel ready to work on them, as of today writing this, (9/28/18) I finally got two days off. I’m going to try to put them to as much use as possible. Maybe start the canvas I have, those canvas are big motivations to make something. I want to make them special so I can hang them up. Maybe some day someone will buy them.

Wait, Did you expect a subject?

God these blog posts are everywhere, I apologize, I’m not good at staying on topic. I think this is a really good way to get things off my chest and practice my writing skills. I haven’t been writing much music but I need to start that as well. I’ve written a few hooks in the past few days but nothing note worthy. I haven’t had any beats to write to either. Have I been producing at all? That’s a big no, I decided to just make beats for fun when I am actually in the mood. I still need to learn more about music theory before I go around trying to make a baseline. Struma Da Bass

 

Today at work a mini van pulled up in my work parking lot and parked right where the register is. At this point I didn’t think anything of it, I honestly didn’t notice till my manager mentioned it. When he did we started joking about how it was a dude taking a nap or some other shit because he instantly got in the back seat. Jokingly, I hinted towards him confronting the man. However, I was the one who ended up going to the car and knocking on the window.

After I knocked a man rolled down his window. All I could hear was what sounded like Fox News or some other sort of News channel. I was busy looking around his car because that was my first reaction was to scope out what he was doing, turns out he was just watching the news.. I asked him if he needed any help since he was just parked there randomly. He instantly pulls out what looks like a cop badge and said “I’m just watching someone I’ll be out of your hair soon.” Probably one of the weirdest moments at my job besides when some rent a cop freaked out because I couldn’t print a receipt.

 

 

 

There’s not much to say about this blog post. More of just a ramble.

 

Much love, Emotionull.

 

Feeling blue

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Trying To Be Positive

Trying to be positive everyday can be very hard, especially for someone like me.. Now that’s kind of a low ball at me but it’s true. I have issues keeping up with consistency, unless of course it’s something that interests me. Video games is a good example of one thing i’ve kept at it. I’ve played video games all my life, for as long as I can remember. As well as computers, I’ve always been a big computer nerd. I’ve self taught myself everything I know about computers from when I was a kid.

Most recently art has really stuck with me. I’ve been making music for about two years now, maybe not. I’ve also recently starting drawing and painting, something I’ve always wanted to do as a kid just never had the confidence. Some people may not like my drawings because they don’t look like your most conventional art. However, why would I want to make conventional art I should make art that I enjoy. So that’s why I make the art that I do. Fuck anyone who says otherwise.

Recently I’ve been pretty down on myself, not working on anything and just laying in bed. It’s not fun, I’d like to change it. I’ve been biking more which I feel as if it’s helping a lot. I want to start making art again though. I bought paint recently to use for my canvas that I bought awhile ago. I hope this really helps me get back into it more. Time will only tell. I’ve had urges to make art but I still want to commit to the week long break I’ve assigned myself. So if you see this posted on my social media and wondering if i’m actually there. I’m not, I have it on auto share.

Much love, Emotionull.

Emotionull Art

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Can’t Create. Stuck In Place.

 A feeling of being stuck not able to create feels awful. It gives me so much anxiety and my sense of self worth drops. I hate feeling this way, I always feel extremely useless. I haven’t made art nor worked on music in a few weeks, I haven’t even tried to pick up a brush or  a marker. My brain just tells myself that I won’t know what to draw or paint but I honestly think of hundreds of things to draw I just don’t bother. I don’t know what it is.

I’ve decided to take about a week long break from social media. Will it help me? Who knows, however it’s still worth giving it a shot. I’ve started biking to work now so I can get active in some way. I lay in bed for hours on end but it’s the only place I feel comfortable. I always feel on edge everywhere else. Like watching your back, hoping no one is upset with you.

Music wise I was luckily able to release Paranoid as it was the last long I recorded before this whole mood switch happened. I still have another song coming, it just needs to be mixed. Maybe I’ll release it when I get back from my little break. I’ve mainly been watching movies and tv shows during this break. I somehow feel the break is justified because the amount of art/music I did during those months that I actually felt like working and being productive. I’m a very lazy person but I enjoy at least doing something while being lazy.

I mainly just hope things change soon, I don’t enjoy feeling this way, I’m sure no one does. I wish I could get back to making art and being happy. Hopefully soon.

 

 

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The Old School Runescape Grind Log #1

So I just recently got back into Runescape, been playing it a lot recently. I decided I’m going to make a sort of series for updates on my account and how far I’ve gotten. I started about a week ago, I only have 9 days of membership left. Out of those nine days depending on how far I get I’ll probably buy a few months of membership.

See my stats below:

I will try and keep these up to date for when I post the actually blog post.

Goals for this account:

My goals are pretty simple. I thought about taking different routes but I want this to be my main. So maxing everything out on this account. I have no idea when this day will come. That’s one reason why I’m starting this sort of blog series to keep track for myself and for anyone else who cares. (no one.)

I haven’t decided what’s skilling level I want to max yet, nor have I picked what money making guide I plan on following. I’ve been working on a guide my friend sim linked me. It’s a sort of beginner guide to get a lot of quests done. I have about 12 quest points right now and I plan to keep finishing them. There isn’t much information I can provide at the moment.

End game? Maybe making money off the game some day. I highly doubt that’s possible but you never know. I’ll mainly be playing the game when working on art or on my down time. The mobile Runescape app does release for IOS on October 30th though. (Late birthday present) I’m super excited for that as I can play at work and on the go. I have a lot of spare time at work. I work at a car wash so majority of my time is spent either drawing, reading, or watching YouTube videos.

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Portfolio Is Now Live!

The website is just about done. It’s only a few small things I have to take care of now and I can release it.

I’m very excited to release it. I’m hoping it will make selling prints a lot easier on my end and others. I plan on adding more items to the shop such as like Print Any Piece so you pick a piece of my art from my Art Portfolio as well as pick a size and I send it to you.

Hopefully I can finish selling the prints I did print so I can print new ones of my newer art or whatever ones you’d like to see. Feel free to email me about any pieces of my art you’d like me to print. [email protected]

Again, feel free to check out Emotionull’s Art Portfolio maybe you’ll see something you like out of the 150+ art pieces and a growing catalog.

 

 

 

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The Overwhelming Urge To Work

As you can tell I’m not the best writer. So here is some of my jumbled thoughts. Enjoy.

 

 

 

I seem to stack myself with projects because I always feel I’m not doing enough at the time. My whole childhood was spent playing video games. I never bothered learning how to play an instrument or anything. I did however run websites. I use to run a couple forums in the past. One of them actually got a decent amount of members. I also ran Professional Minecraft and Terraria servers. The Minecraft sever took off a little.

 

 

Continue reading The Overwhelming Urge To Work

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Come Buy A Commission Baby!

I have official made the commissions page now. You can find it Here. It’s a nice and simple one, I also added a nice little slideshow with a few examples of my art. I don’t expect everyone to fill that out. I still expect a majority of request to go through social media which I don’t mind. Either or is perfect for me.

 

 

I think I’m going to start a music page, probably won’t finish it however. Gotta get back on my Runescape grind.

 

I finished a commission piece today and I was really happy with it. Feel free to hit me up anytime for art! I finished that one in a few hours. I get art back fast! 🙂

 

 

Much love, Null.

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Official Shop Launched

The official Emotionull Art Shop has been launched. You can find all products available  here.

I decided to set it all up on a website to make it easier for me to keep track and easier for you guys to make a purchase. Thank you for supporting to those who do.

 

 

A gallery of all my art is still in the works. I’ll have that set up soon. As well as the commission page.

 

 

Much love, null.

 

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Official Website Launch

The Official Emotionull website has been launched today. I set up the index and the blog so far. I plan on setting up a shop for the prints and art I sell as well as a commission page.I plan on setting up a page for my music that updates with my new music soon and a list of all my current music on all platforms. That will be set up in due time.I use to run a lot of websites in the past so I’m excited to get back into it.if you have any questions feel free to contact me on the contact page or here.