I cried for the first time about death today
I’ve experienced it more than I want
It runs deep, screaming in my front yard.
I’ve got a scar, and I realized it’s there
Not gone
I’ve been suppressing my emotions for so long
I feel utterly withdrawn
As I make my way back to reality
I’ve been confronted with the pain I’ve held back.
Death surrounds me
Death has grown up with me
Death will continue to crawl in my closet
watching, it’s checking its pockets
Looking for the people he dropped
Grabbing those who I care about a lot
Childhood trauma
I hear it a lot
So as I puff this marijuana
And try to find the nirvana I had as a kid
Shit, I wish it was as easy.
Was I even as happy as I believe?
Wish me luck, cause I’m going in.